cowperthwait | lies, evasion, spin, circumspection and cleverly veiled hype

Six workouts a day? Jesus, if he’s so big on staying skinny, why did he ever stop doing coke?

—Wonkette, on Senator Obama's workout regimen

00:48:21 JEC (AIM): I have a tinfoil hat theory. Okay: this morning, Mark Penn refers to Obama as the "establishment candidate". And news of the voluntary staff pay cuts gets "leaked".

00:48:29 Glaucon (AIM): Right.

( Read more... )

… Bat Boy was key source in MLB report | Christian Science Doping Scandal? | Was Mars landing a lie? …

mmn, cake

I thought it was totally brilliant at the time.

I'm so high right now, you could talk me into a trade-in for my Gremlin.

See, Detroit is in trouble now because they've forgotten their roots: pandering to drug users.

[xoxo BoingBoing]

xoxo BoingBoing

Indeed.


In response to the congratulatory e-mails:

Sorry to get everyone's hopes up — I'm not dying.

This summer, I noticed swelling and pain in the middle finger of my left hand, but thought it was linked to an accident caused by Intern George (he rolled my hand up in the window of his car not six hours into his first day of work...). When the swelling never went away, and it started hurting more, the good doctors determined it wasn't a bone fracture, but what was it? I got bounced to a hand specialist at DCAM who identified some kind of tumor massing under/within (!) the first second knuckle. The pain was a spur from where the tumor was exerting pressure on the bone.

Since leaving it in would ultimately really really screw up my joint and become only more difficult to remove, it had to go. So this morning, they sliced me up and extracted the mystery mass from within the joint without damaging any tendon or muscle tissue (go team!). This seems like it would've been exciting to watch, so I was justifiably disappointed that they obscured my view with the canopy.

It seems to have surprised everyone by being larger than expected (I was incredulous — the thing was the size of a goddamn marble), and they don't yet know what it is/was. But while everyone gets jumpy at the "T" word, bone cancer is extremely rare. This is much more likely to be a totally benign soft tissue mass. We'll know for sure when I get my biopsy results early next week.

It's all good. The Codeine's making the roof of my mouth tickle, which is ... interesting ... and I'm annoyed at how slowly I type. But it's all good.


xoxo,
/jec.